Demon Butternut Squash Soup

I had a horrifying kitchen experience last night. I've dubbed it the "Demon Soup Story".

My dear readers, if anyone EVER makes you butternut squash soup, know that they care about you IMMENSELY. Why, you ask?

Because butternut squashes are asshole vegetables. 

To make creamy butternut squash soup in a relatively short amount of time, one needs to cut the squash into small-ish chunks that cook quickly. THIS IS AN INSANELY LABOR INTENSIVE PROCESS THAT WILL RESULT IN PAIN AND HAND CRAMPS FOR THE CHEF. I'm talking about sawing through this LOG of a vegetable. Oh, and then you've gotta peel it, bulges and all, and then seed it. 

Then, once all the veggies have softened, the chef has to blend batches of the mixture until it is smooth. Now, this seems simple. But, when 100% of the soup is in the pot, and 60% is blended, and 40% is still chunky...... finding the chunky parts to blend ain't. easy. 

FINALLY, at this point in the cooking process, your chef will have to reheat the now fully blended butternut squash soup so that it is the perfect temperature when their loved ones eat it. So he or she will heat the soup on the stove, adjusting seasoning if need be ----- until the asshole butternut squash will refuse to die a culinary death and instead "SPIT" at the poor chef as it starts to boil. 

Now, one might say, why not reheat the soup in the microwave at this point to save some time and aggravation? 

NO. Just. NO. After this poor, downtrodden chef has spent HOURS sawing through squash and no-doubt dealing with blender difficulties, there is NO DAMN WAY that he or she will do something as sacrilegious as putting the soup in the microwave. 

So, long story short, having someone make you butternut squash from scratch (and I mean, cutting up the vegetable and not cheating and using that pre-cut nonsense) is truly the culinary equivalent of someone buying you diamonds, a car, or a yacht and needs to be appreciated. 

The end.

P.S. Mom: You are a butternut squash soup making warrior. I have succumbed to defeat, but your recipe is amazing. I will simply wait til you make it from now on.

Recipe: Spiced Pumpkin Soup

One thing I love about being on Weight Watchers -- the recipes!!! This one my meeting leader shared on her Facebook, and I'm sharing it with all of you!

Fall is pumpkin season, but before you reach for a pumpkin spiced latte (5 WW Points for a tall!) -- try this soup to warm you up.

Spiced Pumpkin Soup

Ingredients:

• 1 TBS canola oil
• 1 small onion, finely chopped
• 1 tsp minced garlic
• 1 tsp curry powder
• 1/4 tsp cardamom
• 1/4 tsp salt [or salt substitute]
• 1/4 tsp black pepper
• 2 cups reduced sodium, fat free broth (chicken or vegetable)
• 1 (15 oz) can pumpkin
• 1 (12 oz) can evaporated fat free milk
• 6 TBS plain fat free Greek yogurt

To Make:

1. In a large pot, heat oil. Add onion and cook for 3 minutes, or until soft. Add garlic and cook for 1 minute. Stir in the rest of the spices, salt and pepper.
2. Whisk in broth and pumpkin. Bring to just a boil, reduce heat to low, and simmer for 15 minutes, stirring occasionally. Add milk and simmer for 2 minutes.
3. Using an immersion blender, puree soup until smooth. For thinner texture, add more broth. 
4. Ladle into bowls and garnish with yogurt.

Servings: 6

Each Serving: 104 calories, 14 g carbs, 3 g fat, 7 g protein, 3 g fiber, 3 WW Points Plus

Recipe: "Cream" of Broccoli Soup

My mom made this recipe a few months ago, and I thought it was brilliant. Turns out she snagged it from a Jenny Jones cookbook called "Look Good, Feel Great". I've taken the liberty to modify it just a little by using brown rice and my salt substitute. I've also doubled it, because I tend to think bigger pots of soup make leftovers, which is never a bad idea.

The trick to this recipe is that the soup is thickened -- not by cream -- but by the starches from the rice, which is an infinitely healthier option.

Ingredients:

• 2 teaspoons olive oil
• 1 cup chopped onion
• 1/4 cup long-grain brown rice (I used short grain and it was fine)
• 3 cups chicken or vegetable stock (Aim for low sodium)
• 4 cups fresh broccoli florets (I used broccoli crowns, and chopped them up, and I'm assuming Frozen would do in a pinch)
• 1/2 tsp. salt substitute
• Black pepper (to taste)

To Make:

• In a large pot, heat oil over medium flame. Add onions and cook, stirring occasionally until they are translucent.
• When the onions have had a chance to cook, add the rice, stock, salt substitute, and pepper, and allow mixture to come to a boil. Then reduce heat to low, and simmer (covered) for 20 minutes.
• Stir in broccoli florets and allow mixture to return to boil, increasing the heat to medium. Cover and cook for five minutes, and then remove from the flame.
• Allow soup to cool slightly, and then blend until smooth.
• If the soup is too thick, add more water or stock for your taste.

Serves: 8

Serving:  52 calories, 7 g carbs, 1 g fat, 4 g protein